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Disney Pixar CARS: The PirateDad Contest Winners!

PirateDad & PirateKinder were kind enough to offer up a bounty of BANNED IN THE USA chocolates in return for the best Toons story of your imagination …

Grand Prize winner – 6 EGGS, 2nd prize – eggxactly 4 … what’s an egg prize without a egg pun?

(these eggs are banned because the FDA thinks we might swallow that yellow capsule in a hollow chocolate egg … so please don’t make us cry and do NOT eat the yellow capsule or the CAR inside …)

And the winning entries? DUDE, it’s JOHN in MO & MONICA!


Since the Canada post office is on strike – PirateDad will break for the US to deliver these to the USPS! Thanks PirateDad & PirateKinder!


Dude Ranch Mater

One afternoon, Lightning, Sally, Mater, and Holley take a drive up into the hills over Radiator Springs. During their trip, they pass a fenced-in dirt field with six motorcycles standing around. They stop to watch, and Sally says “What a shame that they have to be cooped up — after all, they used to run free.”

Mater thought for a moment and said, “You know something Miss Sally, I used to run a Dude Ranch where HUNDREDS of them there motorcycles ran free and far”.

Sally: “You did? That sounds so wonderful Mater.”

Lightning: “Mater you didn’t run a Dude Ranch.”

Mater: “Oh I did, Lightning, and it was as beautiful as you could ever imagine, the land stretchin’ out as far as you could see…”

Flashback to a country scene with thousands of acres of untouched land. Dozens upon dozens of motorcycles can be seen roaming the hills as the song “Born To Be Wild” plays. There is a large building with several tow trucks working, including their boss Mater.

“Yep, I ran the whole show. Lots of dudes there working at the Dude Ranch…”

Mater: “Howdy Dude.”

Tow Truck #1: “Dude.”

Mater: “Mornin’ Dude.”

Tow Truck #2: “Dude.”

Mater: “Hey Dude”.

Tow Truck #3: “Dude.”

Mater: “Good to see ya’ Dude.”

Tow Truck #4: “Dude.”

“…Every morning we’d let the motorcycles roam the valleys and the hills, and every evening we’d get ‘em back to the ranch.”

Mater (whipping his tow hook): “Yahh!! Yahh!!”

Various Tow Trucks (whipping their tow hooks): “Yahh!! Yahh!!”

“Now I’m not gonna lie to you, there was times it wuzn’t so fun, like during the Great Stampede. I thought we was gonna lose some of them for good…”

Lightning: “The Great Stampede? What did you do Mater?”

Mater: “Don’t you remember Lightning, you was there.”

Lightning: “I was???”

Mater: “Yep, you was one of the Dudes.”

Flashback to Lightning McQueen with Cowboy Hat facing off with a stampede of motorcycles.


Mater: “Use your tow hook Lightning Dude!!”

Lightning: “Tow hook??? Are you crazy?!?! I don’t HAVE a tow hook!!!”

As the motorcycle stampede gets even closer, we fastforward back to the present in Radiator Springs

Lightning: “Mater, what did I do??? I never had a TOW hook!”

Mater: “Heh heh heh, well you was so scared you just closed yer eyes and revved yer engine, and them motorcycles all just stopped. Lightning, you brought the Great Stampede to an end.”

Lightning: “You’ve got quite the imagination Mater, but I think even YOU have topped yourself.”

Mater: “OK, believe what you want, but it happened.”

Lightning: “I don’t think so Mater.”

Several tow trucks drive through, all tipping their hats and saying “Dude” to Lightning as they go past.


Monica – 2nd Prize

Indiana Mater “Raiders of the Lost Parts” where Mater travels the world to discover treasures from ancient civilizations. I can just imagine Mater and McQueen dodging all the booby traps with Mater using his towhook as his whip.

Original post & entries.


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22 June 2011 Disney Pixar 17 Comments


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